I was working in one of our more disheveled ministry sites a couple weeks ago. The last time I had been there, my group and I spent three days painting a tight stairwell and cleaning out a dusty basement – neither of which had even the slightest ventilation. The site had their maintenance man leading us through this wonderful journey – his name was Wayne. Wayne was this sort of this one-man show, a jack-of-all-trades. Basically anything that had to be done at the main building, or at the various housing sites, had to be done by this one man. In this basement, I quickly realized that all the work we were doing was basically everything Wayne would have had to do himself. So if no one else would appreciate the work we were doing – Wayne would.
But on this day that I showed up (again not knowing what we were doing) I was greeted by Wayne and his readiness for us to clear lots at the residential buildings. Upon arriving at the second house we were cleaning, Wayne pulled me aside and asked if I was in school and what I was doing with my life. I told him that I had actually just graduated and that I didn’t particularly know what I was doing with my life. Then Wayne proceeded to tell me that I should work with some kind of community development because I seemed to be very organized and he suspected I would probably also be very good at organizing people. Now I’m not really the type of person to believe that God often speaks in a literal, audible voice; rather I think He speaks to me in feelings and nudges. In a thought that sparks in my mind out of nowhere. But in this moment, when Wayne was speaking to me in the kitchen of this house, I had to just step back and say, “Okay God, I hear you.”
I’ve always said that I would not like to work in a traditional box-set job: teacher, preacher, counselor. And in this last year, I’ve realized how important it is for me to work with people. I’ve realized that I cannot be fulfilled without that. Which is what drew me to the hosting job with CSM in the first place.
Here I have learned to push beyond my own comfort boundaries and God has really given me grace and peace and strength in places that I so desperately needed it. To be able to talk to a stranger on the streets. To be able to hug a child that I’ve barely known a week. To build relationships with people that I’ve had just a couple interactions with.
I believe that God has called me to work with people in some sort of ministry setting. And this summer I have realized just how important urban ministry is. I have learned to love people I couldn’t have seen myself even having a conversation with before. My desire now, is just pour more of myself into that community and continue to experience love beyond my own understanding.
here's a link for the job description: http://www.csm.org/apprenticeship.php
also, i did get the job.
